Sunday, December 31, 2006

Wild Boys

Well, it looks like both the Giants and the Jets have clinched wildcard spots. Woo-hoo!

My Beloved Tiki surely shut up the naysayers with his record-setting runs on Saturday, and watching the Jets win today was totally awesome (dudes).

It helped that they recruited trolls and orcs for third down plays.

Do I think either team will go far in the playoffs? Eh. Although I have a little more faith in the Jets than the Giants. We shall see.

In the meantime, you can go check out my photos of the game here. They'd be a lot better if I had about $800 more worth of camera (not to mention sideline passes), but I'm fairly pleased.

And that's it for our New Year's Eve activities. We made it home fairly early and had pizza to top off the stadium junk food. We are pooped, going to bed, and very glad not to be anywhere near Times Square tonight.

Happy happy to all of you, and may all of your dreams come true for the new year... except the really creepy ones. Nobody needs naked zombies walking around.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Aw, Poot.

I am so behind the times. I was just listening to The Darkness' last album on my iPod, and wondered to myself if they'd be touring the U.S. anytime soon. Well, lo and behold, it turns out their wildly entertaining frontman, Justin Hawkins, went and quit the job this past October, on account of a cocaine addiction.

Now I applaud anyone who has the guts and resolve to straighten him or herself out from a major addiction and do what needs to be done to keep from relapsing. But come on, this is rock n' roll! Couldn't he have hung in there at least long enough for me to see them live once? How disappointing.

Most of all, I think I'm mad that I missed the giant boobies.

Friday Cat Blog - You Can't See Me

My in-laws' cat, Samson, cleverly hiding behind this branch. It's natural camouflage in action!

Monday, December 25, 2006

Crotch Rockets

Ah, Christmas in Brooklyn. After our traditional pannetone-and-eggnog french toast breakfast and present exchange, I have awoken from my second nap, no children to appease or guests to entertain - only a girlfriend to smooch and some cats to torture. It's good to be home again.

We are such lesbians. Other than the Rufus tickets, I gave her slippers and jewelry, and she gave me football tickets. Don't worry, I don't fix transmissions and sport a dark moustache. I use creme bleach!

Normally, I'd be disappointed that Mrs. Nator couldn't get Giants tickets, but they suck so hard this year I'm glad we're going to see the Jets. She's even going with me - and on New Year's Eve! Should be fun.

The one thing I don't get is the placement of the logo on the football player on the tickets. Did they really think hard about their marketing?

What'djyoo get?

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

We Has A Tree! Pt Teh Dos

Well, Mrs. Nator's back started spasming, then she had to fly to Atlanta - poor thing is a stressed-out mess. So, it was up to me to decorate the tree by myself. It lost a lot of needles (I told you it was dry), but here are the results.

O Tannenbaum, O Tannenbuam, Das ist nicht as giltzy as I hopeden...

Tacky tree, Sputnik lamp and plaster holes that look like continents: a study. ...And disco ball.

Spotlight on: a spotlight! Actually a vintage tacky tree topper. Does not come with 78 recording of heavenly chorus and harp music, but should.

Bird's eye view: this little gold glass birdy can see some vintage glass ornaments, a Mexican tin rocking horse, a home-made Sculpey turtle and my masterpiece Xmas Moai shrinky-dink.

Here we see more vintage ornaments, tin icicles, a Balinese carved cat angel (we're all multi-culti here, n' shit), wooden toy and another fabulous Sculpey creation - this time a depiction of our bed with all three cats on it. Please, don't push - you'll smudge the bulletproof glass protecting it.

This here's my stocking. I felt kind of crummy when my stocking was lost and I had to borrow one for several years, so I enlisted Mrs. Nator's help a few Christmases ago to make The Stocking of My Dreams. She made the red velvet footie topped with fake fur, and I made the Santa Cat with bag o' toys with felt and other crafty crap. Damn, when did I ever have the free time to do this kind of stuff...?

Look into my crazy-ass felt eyes! Muooahahahaaaa!
(Note actual feline hair stuck to face for added authenticity.)

And that's the tour! Now I'm off to Atlanta tomorrow, and my back is bothering me! Joy to the motherhumpin' World, childrens! Have a Merry...

Monday, December 18, 2006

We Has A Tree!

This is not it, nor is this our cat, but a looks a little like The Doodle, so what the hell?

Yes, as late as Friday I was having a stress and exhaustion induced breakdown and weeping that I didn't have the energy to do anything, much less decorate for Christmas. I'm not sure what did it - a decent night's sleep, perhaps, or the sugar from cookie consumption, but yesterday I not only did some much-needed cleaning around the house, but went out, bought a tree, lugged it home and up 4 flights of stairs, set it up and put the lights on, all by myself! The only hitches I hit were a severe lack of needle retention (it was the last tree at the store, so, although it turned out to be the exact perfect size, it was a wee bit dry), and angling it through the curvy stairways in our 19th-century building.

I wanted to surprise Mrs. Nator with it, but I had to call her at her office party to ask where the recharged battery for the power saw was. It didn't help me any, because she had no idea, but it proved a good story for her coworkers, as she told them how concerned she was about what was going on when I suddenly called threatening to use power tools for some unknown reason. "Honey, put the cats on the phone..." Anyway, the needles tracked up the staircase would have been a dead giveaway when she got home, that is if she wasn't too drunk to notice...

Anyway, now all we have to do it decorate it tonight with some of my ridiculous collection of vintage ornaments. I'm feeling tired today, but I will be glad to have it done for the days I will have off and be home for the holidays (provided no cats destroy it while we're in The Dirty South). Nothing is quite so cozy as a Christmas tree twinkling away. And it covers the smells of cat piss and turtle funk, too!

By the way, we got all our care packages mailed out this weekend, too, so clearly we are totally awesome. I'm sure you are dying to know what sorts of cookies we sent out, so here's a list:

  • Chocolate/candied ginger drops
  • Pecan sandies
  • Lemon iced cookies
  • Chocolate shortbread with a white chocolate/peppermint fondant
  • Linzer cookies &
  • a caramel/chocolate cracker bark (very white trash and utterly addictive)
Aren't we special?

One more day of work to get through, now, and I'm off until the 28th. Woo-hoo!

If you do any holiday prep, what is it? How's it goin'?

Friday, December 15, 2006


1. It smells like cookies up in our joint.

2. The words "rufus wainwright" have finally oustripped the words "horse dick" as the keywords most searched for this blog.

That is all.

Friday Cat Blog - Teh Cuteness

Maurice and The Doodle say "whaaa...?"

Why is it they always know when you are sneaking up on them to take a picture of cute snuggling behaviour, and move?

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Wainwright Family Christmas Album

Well, we had a lovely time at the show. It definitely had a very seat-of-the-pants, family living-room feel to it, which made it both endearing and a little odd when you realized you had paid over $60 to witness it in Carnegie Hall. Mrs. Nator has a theory that Rufus Wainwright was told since he was born that we was the most wonderful, prettiest boy in the room, and thus he feels free to do whatever he feels on stage and people will still love him. I imagine he's had some criticism, particularly from his father, but a combination of talent, charisma, privilege, defiance, lack of performance anxiety and naturally massive ego overcame it. Thus endeth the psychological analysis.

Anyway, there were definitely rough parts to the show, but overall it was enjoyable. David Byrne was a no-show, but Laurie Anderson was vintage weird Laurie Anderson (she can do no wrong with me since she asked me onstage with her during a performance piece in, Lord, 1989 or 90 I think), and Lou Reed was vintage New York-cool Lou Reed, playing it up for a funny duet on White Christmas with Rufus. Teddy Thompson and family added a bit of British humour to the mix, including a folksy rendition of Wham!'s "Last Christmas" and a ditty which began "Christmas is crap." He has a very nice voice, indeed. Joseph Gordon-Levitt (go figure), while not the best singer, performed a very earnest anti-war Christmas song he wrote which induced Mrs. Nator to dub him a lesbian. I thought Jimmy Fallon would irritate me, but he did a self-mocking version of the Ramones' "Merry Christmas (I Don't Want to Fight Tonight)" and a gleefully goofy duet with Martha Wainwright on "Baby, It's Cold Outside" that won me over.

Speaking of Wainwrights, Martha wins me over, as well, a little bit each time I see her. I find her compulsive writhing while singing a bit annoying, and sometimes her voice irritates me, but other times she hits just the right rough-edged soprano reminiscent of Cyndi Lauper and Kate Bush that is very impressive. Anyway, she was nothing in the writhing department compared to Antony (of Antony and the Johnsons), whose performance style was like Joe Cocker goes gay emo goth. I'd never heard of him before; he does have a very arresting voice, for sure, but I'm not sure I could listen to a full CD of depressive drama. I'll have to find out more about him.

Others in the Wainwright clan who appeared included Sloan Wainwright - who rocked a very soulful version of Queen's "Thank God It's Christmas" - assorted cousins and others, including Lily Lanken, who sung in a clear soprano on almost every song but looked like the world's most embarassed, self-hating teenage while doing it, and both Anna and Kate McGarrigle. Kate only played on one song and the encore, giving a tearful speech thanking everyone for coming and her family for taking such good care for her. I'm not sure what illness she has that has weakened her so, but it made it worth the expense of tickets to think some of that money might go towards her medical costs.

Naturally, Rufus was the star of the show, and whereas Mrs. Nator favoured his version of "O Holy Night" in the original French, my favourite was his soaring, aching, gloriously over-the-top rendition of “What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve," which brings out my inner weeping drag queen every time (that and Judy Garland's late-life rendition of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" - oy, the Weltenschmerz! But I digress...). Oh, and I loved his little Tyrolean-style hat and outfit, no doubt in homage to his boyfriend, Jörn Weisbrodt, who works at the Berlin Opera. Makes you wonder if he's going to write the opera the Met commissioned in German. (God, I'm such a queen.)

Anyway, we had a great time, despite being berated by an usher for "recording the music". (I showed him that my "recording device" was a camera, much like other people were using, and he said "other people" would think I was "recording", so if I didn't put it away they'd take it from me. I did get some photos, though, which you can see here.) The most important part was that Mrs. Nator had fun and was inspired to re-consider and perhaps actually sing at her office Christmas party as everyone has been requesting, so Merry Christmas to her!

As for me, I've been asleep most of the day, and now have several dozen cookies to make. Excuse me if I croon while I bake...

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Thoughts For The Day

or, three whines and a W00T!

1. Don't you hate it when you buy something for someone on the Interwebs and it's not as you thought it would be? I can't get more specific than that, 'cause it's a present for Mrs. Nator and she reads this sometimes, but grrr...

2. Thank you to the guy standing several feet from me on the subway last night whose breath was so bad that it was coming out of his nose and stinking up the entire end of the train. I was concentrating so hard on blocking the odour out that I missed my stop and had to sit near it that much longer. USE A BREATH MINT, DUDE, for reals.

3. Holy Exodus, Batman! The most-likely gay character on NBC's Heroes seems to have been unceremoniously de-gayed. The show, which involves people with superhuman abilities much like the mutants of X-Men comic and movie fame, seemed to have clearly outed the character "Zach" in it's last episode, not to mention his fictional myspace page. Now, it seems, despite clear and precendential analogies between anti-gay and anti-mutant rhetoric in the geekdom zeitgeist, his marketing materials have been skewed straight. See for more on this bicurious backpedalling.

and finally,
4. Baby, I'm ready to go... out to dinner and the concert tonight, that is, and then on to my day off tomorrow! Even though I have several tasks to do on my little holiday, I have been so exhausted and stressed lately that I am inordinately excited about seeing the show at Carnegie hall and not having to go to work tomorrow. Also, I just had a giant-ass mocha. So: yee-haw!

So, how's by you?

Tuesday, December 12, 2006


4 out of 6 kinds of cookies down. 2 more left to make for our Christmas care packages. Mrs. Nator made most of them, but I'm still exhausted. Cookies and little tchotchkes may be cheaper than large gifts, but not by much, what with the ingredients and shipping. Then there's the baking and packing. It's a labour of love - awwww!

It would be nice to get them done tonight, but I'm not going to kill myself to do it. I took Thursday off, since we'll be doing Mrs. Nator's big present Wednesday night - going to the Wainwright Family Christmas at Carnegie Hall. Actually, it was going to be her big present, but, as usual, I couldn't stop buying her stuff, so she'll be getting some nice stuff on Christmas, too.

Me, I will be broke.

Anyway, I'd like the day off to be a day off, but I have the feeling I'll be baking and wrapping and packing.

How I wish those were all euphemisms!

Friday, December 08, 2006

Friday Cat Blog - Queen Annie

Here is my mother's marmalade kitty, Annie, waiting to be served.

"And I expect the sardines to be fresh..."

Thursday, December 07, 2006

I found out last night that my friend J passed away. Her funeral is on Saturday.

I've been pretty numb about it. After all, the last time I saw her, I was so stricken by her condition that I not only knew the end was near, but I hoped it was, to end her suffering.

Still, it's starting to seep in. She was a wonderful, kind human being, a talented photographer and cycling enthusiast, whose eyes would twinkle with childlike excitement when something interested her. She was always looking for ways to be nice to and help those around her, and she was not yet forty years old.

It's not just a loss for those of us who knew her. The world can ill afford losing such a loving, amazing person.

I wish I still had the confidence I used to that after death comes a better place. Sigh.

So. Sad.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

While You Were Away...

Since I stopped doing animal communication over a year ago, I have gradually stopped checking my old site email (I have an automatic response that says I'm not practicing now and refers clients elsewhere). On a whim, I decided to purge the electric tons of spam in that account inbox, and stumbled upon this:
Date: Fri, 6 Oct 2006 16:52:49 -0400 [10/06/2006 01:52:49 PM PST] From: xxxxxxxx To: xxxxxxxxx Subject: ABC Television is looking for a family to feature!

Dear [Da Nator],

I am the Casting Producer for ABC Televisions hit show, Wife Swap. I havebeen researching pet communicators/pet psychologists and found your website! I am looking for a family where mom or dad is a pet communicator or pet psychologist! I thought it couldn't hurt to reach out to you to see if you were interested in this opportunity.

In case you are unfamiliar with the show, the premise of Wife Swap is to take two different families and have the mom's switch place to experience how another family lives. Half of the week, mom lives the life of the family she is staying with. Then she introduces a "rule change" where she implements rules and activities that her family has. It's a positive experience for people to not only learn but teach about other families and other ways of life.

Wife Swap airs on Disney owned ABC television on Mondays at 8 pm- the family hour! There is another show that copies ours. We focus on having fun, learning and teaching. They focus on conflict. I just want to make sure our show doesn't get confused with theirs!

Requirements: Each family should consist of two parents and at least one child over the age of five and should reside in the continental U.S.

If you and your family meet the requirements as stated above and are interested in this opportunity, please contact me right away! If not, perhaps you know a family that meets the requirements and might want to apply! This is a very unique experience that can be life changing for everyone. In addition, each family that tapes an episode of Wife Swap receives a $20,000 honorarium. I know your time is money as well so if you refer a family that appears on our program you will get $1000 as a 'thank you" from us.

I know this is an unusual request but I appreciate you taking the time to read this. If you have any questions, please call me at the number below. Please let me know if you may be able to help me. Thank you for your time.

xxxxxxxxxx | Casting Producer| ABC Television Wife Swap

Oh my goodness! I am so sorry I missed out on the opportunity to "teach about other families and other ways of life"! Do you think they would count our cats and turtles as children? Perhaps they could arrange to have Mrs. Nator and I legally married so we could participate!

Oh, wait, it turns out Wife Swap has already featured episodes with gay men and lesbians... and there was no conflict in those at all! Too bad I don't have children, or I might get to spend several weeks being hounded by cameras while I endure "living the life" of a homophobic family who eats cats and dogs raw, and their mommy teaches my children that lesbians go to Hell and how to make turtle soup out of our pets! Whee!

Oh, the missed opportunites for learning and fame...

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

What's All This I Hear About Banning Trans Fats?

Banning trans fats is a terrible, terrbile thing. So many Americans are overweight nowadays, and that's hard enough. It's not their fault that they feel they're a different gender! Sure, it may be a little hard for them to find clothing that fits. But sending them out of the city is blatant discrimination...

Huh, what? Ohhhhh...

Never mind.

Busy, Busy, Busy

No time to write a real post right now, maybe later.

In the meantime, tell Santa what you want.