Thursday, April 13, 2006

I Heel For You, I Think I Love You

According to the NY Times, super-high heeled shoes are going to be all the fashion this spring and summer. I suppose I should not be surprised, as Mrs. Nator, who seems to always just be slightly ahead of the trends, sent me a picture of some terribly tall Steve Maddens she simply had to order yesterday. Mind you, this is a woman who went through embarrassment and excruciating pain after breaking her foot in a fall down a hill from towering platform shoes several years back, but who am I to judge? She does have great gams to show off, and I can’t say that some of the hairdos I wore in my stylish past (yes, I had one) couldn’t be life-threatening.

The thing is, even more than I worry for women’s feet and about submission to the patriarchy (because P-Funk reunions aside, how many men do you think will be sporting stacked heels anytime soon?), I’m afraid Mrs. Nator won’t be able to even hear me anymore. She is an unusually tall woman to begin with, and with these types of shoes she may border on altitudinous. It might fit in with her plans to feel big and strong, but I still subscribe, for several reasons, to the tradition of being a woman in comfortable shoes, and I’m not sure how it will affect the relationship if I am continually at crotch licking level while standing up. Although that might fit in with her plans, too, come to think of it.

Does anyone know where I can take stilt-walking lessons?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

lighten up the colours of what you write. you cant read them like this

Anonymous said...

Actuall, I don't have any trouble reading the red as long as I'm wearing my glasses (the contrast is rough on an astygmatism).

Anyhoo...NO WAY am I slapping on 4" heels much less 6" heels! That just ain't walkable! Not even Bettie Page could do it!